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Spies and Undercover Agents Share The Craziest Thing They Had To Do To Keep Their Cover

Don’t you think it would be exciting to work as an uncover cop or some sort of spy? Sure, it might seem like these sorts of jobs only really exist in action movies, but they’re an actual thing. It makes you wonder how many times you saw an uncover agent and didn’t even realize it. Although this job is very dangerous, somebody has to catch the bad guys (and they can’t even celebrate without blowing their cover)…. 

Photo: creativecommons.org/Chris Hunkeler

The real-life superheroes who act as undercover agents live to tell their crazy stories of thieves, schemers, and dark-alley dealers, and some are not what you think. When push comes to shove, these undercover police officers almost blew their cover, and it was only by luck, quick thinking, or a trusty companion that their identities remained safe.

The Mule

I must have been 15 when one day, the doorbell rang, and I opened the door to two guys looking very much like real tough street guys. They showed me their badges and asked for my mum or dad. It turned out that they wanted to stake out a public playground behind our garden that was used by some drug dealers for their mules….

Photo: creativecommons.org/eXtensionHorses

There was a multi-story bank near the playground, but the bank didn’t want anything to do with it. So they asked my parents whether they could set up a surveillance team on our terrace for a couple of days. My parents allowed it. And my mum prepared food for the guys all week long. They got everything they needed. Reddit User: kirchberg

Her Dad Had Another Family

My dad did undercover for several years and talked about a drug head that he hung out with all the time and even babysat her kids when she went out to get high. This went on for several months while they were figuring out who the big dealer was and acquiring warrants. They arrested her and a bunch of others in the area….

Photo: creativecommons.org/brad_holt

He said it was actually really difficult because he had become an important part of those kids’ lives and was attached to them, and now they didn’t have a mother. How sad. I have no idea how he balanced this crazy second life and then came home and acted like a normal husband and father in our family. Reddit User: Crom80x

Undercover Junkie

I know a guy who often went undercover as a junkie. I knew him from working with him at a gas station because he eventually quit his job undercover for many reasons but wanted to keep busy, so he got a low-key job at the gas station I had been working at for years. He was very committed to his job, though….

Photo: creativecommons.org/airtight-junkies

He’d stop showering for a while before a gig and pee on his tracksuit before going in to work. I don’t know if I would do that for a job. He was so good that he managed to get the same dealer convicted twice in the space of a year, and they never suspected he was the rat. He had multiple police records under different names too. Reddit User: seanbeag

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He Was the Gardener

I once was the gardener for a cop who worked undercover in the sex trade to identify pimps as well as traffickers and extract underage kids. She was such a nice woman, and eventually very open about her time being undercover. She retired early due to mental health issues, which is sad because they were likely stemming from drug use during her time undercover….

Photo: creativecommons.org/Eric Pesik and Deanna Pesik

To keep cover, she would do the drugs that were being offered and used. Of course, things spiraled out of control for her, and suddenly she was on permanent paid leave, and she stayed in the house most days hiding from the world. So for her, what she did to keep cover is offer up her sanity in exchange for some successful arrests. Reddit User: whyevenbotherbeing

Felt Bad for Busting Them

He was an undercover narcotics cop for 14 years during the ’70s and ’80s with the NJSP. He had to do coke one night. Then he started having a minor paranoia/panic attack. He was breathing heavily and went out for air; his heart was pounding out of his chest, panicking when one of the gangsters came outside to talk to him….

Photo: creativecommons.org/Niagara Photo

“Man, I’ve never seen someone snort that much at once! Are you okay?” He sighed a huge sigh of relief and was like, “I’m having trouble breathing.” Everyone was joking that he had the heart of a lion to take that much. He actually felt bad about locking that one guy up when it all went down. Reddit User: MAGIGS

The Cops Beat Him Up

My cousin was an undercover ATF agent back in the day. Anyway, they were trying to bust some guys for illegal alcohol distribution and were building rapport by going undercover. My cousin doesn’t take his ATF badge with him when he’s undercover because if anyone ever saw it, he could get shot. Anyway, some hot-headed cops came over and started harassing them…. 

Photo: creativecommons.org/Waaghals

The police started getting physical, and they beat the crap out of my cousin and the guys he was trying to get evidence from. They took them all in to the police station only to find out that my cousin was ATF. My cousin was angry, because cops aren’t supposed to beat people up. He’s currently filing a lawsuit against that police dept. Reddit User: johnny_tremain

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It Was a Surreal Moment

We had a situation where a major police department planted a cop in prison to get information on a guy they believed was orchestrating hits from inside the prison. The warden knew, and I knew (by accident), but not a single other CO knew, nor did any of the staff, including medical, and that’s the way they wanted it. He went through receiving, and he was categorized and placed…. 

Photo: creativecommons.org/Seluryar

It was pretty wild, to say the least. He was there for a week; he got the info they needed for the investigation and got him out. It didn’t become public knowledge that he was undercover until after I had left, and it was a long while after, as they were making a case. That was a surreal moment. Reddit User: HunterQThompson

They Caught Him

One time a homeland security officer came up to my house undercover, flashed his badge, and asked if he could come in. Once he was in, he pulled out a piece of paper with my neighbor’s face on it. He asked if I had seen him around lately when I asked what he did and let him know I hadn’t seen him around, and he told me what he was wanted for….

Photo: creativecommons.org/JobsForFelonsHub

This guy was bad: assault, child abuse, and drugs, the whole lot. It turns out he assaulted his step-daughter, and once he found out he was wanted, he went back to El Salvador. I thought they only flashed their badges in the movies, but it turns out that crap is real, and they caught the jerk (thank goodness). Reddit User: bigburt

He Was Figured Out

Not a cop, but in college, I took a few criminal justice classes. Our professor, whom I will call Bob, was a cop for 15 or so years and had gone undercover in the ’80s for a very long time. Bob was biker as a hobby, and he was sent undercover to break up a drug ring in the biker community….

Photo: creativecommons.org/Crazyflyinmidget

Bob arranged to buy some drugs from some guy, and shortly after the buy, the dealer was arrested. The dealers’ sister started telling everyone she thought Bob was a cop, and some of the other bikers started asking him questions. He got out of there pretty quickly after that. Reddit User: Cthulha243

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Healthy Gang Member

My cousin worked undercover in the biker community. He was really into working out and bodybuilding, so he managed to convince everybody that he treated his body like a temple and didn’t drink, do drugs, or eat like crap. You would think that they would catch on, because why would someone like that want to be in a biker gang, but oh well….

Photo: creativecommons.org/Paula R. Lively

That wasn’t very far from the truth, so it wasn’t hard for him to play that part. He’s also a former Marine sharpshooter, so he’s tough as nails and pretty heavily tattooed, so he definitely gave off a ‘don’t mess with me’ vibe. I would be too scared to do something like that, but he’s as brave as they come. Reddit User: csudebate

Overprescribing Narcotics

I know a guy (retired police officer) who works as an investigator of crooked doctors. Working undercover with doctors isn’t really the first thing you think of when thinking undercover. He dresses up in disguises and is given a fake name to use. He goes into doctor’s offices and tries to find out if a doctor who’s suspected of overprescribing narcotics is legit or not…. 

Photo: creativecommons.org/NIHClinicalCenter

He told me a story about a time he went in to see a dentist about a minor toothache and walked out of there with a prescription for Percocet and Dilaudid. He says there are plenty of legit doctors out there, but there are also a lot of careless ones who give in to their drug-seeking patients. Reddit User: YOUNGJOCISRELEVANT

Her Grandfather Was Undercover

It wasn’t me, but my grandfather. Guy worked narcotics, had to get in with some guys who dealt meth, and was pretending to be a user himself (I believe he actually had to shoot up once or twice). One day, one of the higher-ups was starting to get suspicious and didn’t believe my grandpa was actually a user or anything because he didn’t have any marks on his arms…. 

Photo: creativecommons.org/skvidal

My grandpa told them that he doesn’t shoot there, but near his pelvis; he said he was more than happy to pull down his pants and undies to show them what he meant. He lives in a whole other state now for safety reasons because a lot of the guys he put away years ago are now getting out. Reddit User: [redacted]

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Family Friend Just Got Out of a Coma

Here’s a crazy story for you. My father’s friend is an undercover police officer who spent the last two months in the hospital. He’s such a great guy, and I’m so glad everything ended up being okay, but the story is crazy. He was put in a coma when his target found out that he was a cop….

Photo: creativecommons.org/liber

They beat him to death, so they thought. It took the police over an hour to get to him. He had a brain bleed and multiple fractures. The risk those guys take by going undercover is remarkable. When he was in a coma, I was sure he was going to die. He made an amazing recovery and is now finishing recovery at home! Reddit User: TRASHYRANGER

Your Boy Is a Narc

My husband and his brother worked for neighboring departments. The husband was undercover narcotics, and his brother was a beat cop. One night my husband was buying some crack from a group of dudes. One of the friends of the seller recognized my husband, probably from the court or something. The seller’s friend started saying, “This guy’s a freaking cop!”

Photo: creativecommons.org/olycopwatchphoto

“I know he’s a cop. I’ve seen him before! You have to tell us if you’re a cop!” My husband replies, “No, I’m not a freaking cop. My piece of crap brother is. How do you know my brother? [Seller], your boy is a freaking narc.” Seller and his other friends beat the crap out of the guy who recognized my husband. Reddit User: GreatHammerHeadShark

Hotel Worker Is the Middle Man

I used to work third shift at the front desk of a cheap hotel while I was in college. We had a shady couple check-in and stay for about two weeks. One night I walk in for work, and my manager and the cops are waiting for me in the lobby. They informed me that room 204 had been busted dealing drugs out of the room….

Photo: creativecommons.org/insane photoholic

They told me the cops were going to hang out all night in the room, and when I received calls for that room, I was to send it on to them as if everything was normal. All night I received calls and forwarded them on. It was kind of fun being a small part of a bust like that. Reddit User: JHam67

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Hobo-Cop

Not me, but a close family friend worked for three years as an undercover homeless narcotics officer in a beach city here in southern CA, and he was born and raised in this city, so he fit in perfectly. He was really good at his job and caught many people. He didn’t cut his hair or beard the whole time….

Photo: creativecommons.org/olycopwatchphoto

And he wore a colorful poncho sweater every day with two rotating days “off” for almost 1100 days. He really stunk for so long that to this day, he doesn’t catch it when he’s gross. Christmas time was interesting, to say the very least. He was so good at it he refused several promotions and became known as robocop around the department and family. Reddit User: Rstates

Young Cop Gets Addicted

I worked forensic psych for over 15 years. Not long after I got started there, there was a story in the newspaper about a young cop who had just graduated from the academy. He was young but looked very young, like 16 years old. So the powers that be decided to put him in schools to combat the “growing drug problem….”

Photo: creativecommons.org/olycopwatchphoto

And he was playing a high school student interested in buying and dealing. Apparently, all went well for a while, but then he started using cocaine. So they sent him to us to see what the heck went wrong and if he was responsible for being addicted to cocaine. He was also charged legally with drug charges, and now he’s in a psych hospital. Reddit User: brutalethyl

He Thought I Was Dumb

I was a UC, and I regularly worked ruses because I don’t look like what I did, and I was really good at it. I’m not in law enforcement anymore because of medical. The craziest thing I did was to let the suspect get close enough to me to think he could influence me; he thought I was a dumb 20-something looking for a job…. 

Photo: creativecommons.org/Orin Zebest

To be fair, he wasn’t a bad-looking guy, but with what this guy did, it’s a hard no from me. Selling him on being innocent and naive, I got layouts of his offices, the computer counts for evidence and seizure, and identified co-conspirators in the scheme. The indictment was under seal, so my identity was never revealed. Reddit User: UnforgettableBevy

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He Was a Dead Man

An undercover cop in my hometown committed suicide (shot himself) in his truck after leaving the gym. He was in pretty deep with some high-profile drug dealers and dangerous people. I attended this gym and got the details from my personal trainer. The story is that he was working out with one of the kingpin drug dudes and a girl he used to date approached him….

Photo: creativecommons.org/DetectiveGreg

She said she “wished he was in uniform because he was cuter” or something along the lines of that; she had no idea he was undercover. I guess he called his wife in the bathroom at the gym and said he was sorry and that he was a dead man, and then he shot himself. Sad, sad, sad. Reddit User: HilltopHewitt

They Pretended to Be Mormons

Not my story, but one of my dad’s best friends was a Hong Kong detective back in the ’70s and ’80s when it was under British rule still. When the Mormon Missionaries first started coming in and going through the more crime-filled areas, the local mafias didn’t think twice about doing anything illegal in front of them in broad daylight…. 

Photo: creativecommons.org/Mark Peterson

They hollowed out blue books to carry their guns and badges that looked like a Book of Mormon. They made enough arrests in 3 months that the church flew whatever person is at the top of the group for missionaries to complain to the police department because nobody would let the missionaries in their homes thinking they were cops. Reddit User: [readacted]

Held a Gun in His Mouth

Not one myself, but my ex was. The craziest one I heard was that one of them had a gun shoved in their mouth when they refused to sample the product. And yes, the cops outside were losing their minds listening to it unfold. Dude had been a UC for a long time and was a heck of a talker…. 

Photo: creativecommons.org/Orin Zebest

The CI with him at the time also kept their cool, so that helped.  If I remember right, SWAT hit the house the next day. It was some years ago, so maybe it was a week or so later. But you get the point. Obviously, there’s more to it, but it’s been 15 or so years since I’ve heard it so bear with my memory. Reddit User: JrSm1tty

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He Got “Shot”

One time I had a Hollywood special effects guy to rig me up with a squib and radio control remote under my clothes. It all worked out perfectly. I was supposed to get “shot” in a bust, where the two connected individuals would be there to witness. The facade was completed a couple of months later, and it was a sight to see….

Photo: creativecommons.org/jdlasica

I got an outpatient procedure to recreate a scar that looked like a bullet wound. You may be thinking this is a serious length to go to, but no, all worth it. About a year after that, I was re-inserted with so much cred, and I made it all the way to upper management and helped bring the organization down. Reddit User: [redacted]

Her Mother Was Undercover

My mother was selected to go undercover in the Hillside Strangler case and spent most of December 1977 and January 1978 pretending to be a prostitute in and around Los Angeles. She actually had a conversation with Bianchi when he pulled up to check her out one night. She was too old (28 at the time) to fit their profile, and they didn’t take her….

Photo: creativecommons.org/plong

She has an assortment of pretty crazy stories: busting a PCP factory when she was eight months pregnant with me, dropping a handcuffed assailant on his face after he tried punching her, chasing people on foot through back alleys in South Central, neutralizing a hostage situation in which the perp claimed he was receiving messages from outer space…. Reddi User: Baronvonzeugma

He Broke Sobriety

Not me, but my best friend when he was a cop. He was a member of Alcoholics Anonymous and struggling with alcoholism for a long time, as it ran in his family as well. While working undercover, he got into a situation where the perpetrator wanted to go drinking with him. This left him in a dilemma because he had done all this work on recovery…. 

Photo: creativecommons.org/matt512

He chose to drink and later was able to make the arrest. He wrote it off as a job requirement and was able not to use his work-related drinking scenario as a relapse. It’s a crazy situation. Luckily, he’s been sober for over 25 years except for that one night while undercover. I’m very proud of him. Reddit User: markko79

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He Quit His Job

I had a teacher that spent 15 years doing undercover narcotics work. After spending all that time working in that line of work, he said that it made him feel really sad a lot, so he wanted to quit that job and become a teacher so that college students know what they’re getting in to. He once had the classic “snort the line to prove you’re not a cop” scenario come up….

Photo: creativecommons.org/US Department of Education

He said that he basically blew the line with no hesitation whatsoever but had to report the incident to his superiors. This is why some cops go the other way. Dude had some crazy stories and was honestly one of my most honest and favorite professors. When someone can tell you the real stuff that happens, it’s the best. Reddit User: [redacted]

Mark, Is That You?

It’s not especially crazy, but a friend of mine was a cop for years. One day he pulled over a speeder. This grungy-looking white trash guy got out of the car (this was a state and time where that was okay). My friend peered at the guy standing on the side of the highway and said, “Mark (or whatever his name was), is that you?”

Photo: creativecommons.org/LukeGordon1

It was another cop he hadn’t seen for a long time. The guy (‘Mark’) shushed him and said, “Just give me the ticket and don’t tell anyone you saw me.” It turns out he had been undercover in a biker gang for about two years trying to find out where heroin was getting into the state from. Reddit User: 7LeagueBoots

Her Mom Got Busted

My mom got busted selling drugs because the police would come in undercover to the house with a mic in their beer can. She shouldn’t have done it, sure, because drugs are really bad. It was always an issue growing up, but as of late, she’s clean and getting healthy. That probably wouldn’t have happened if it wasn’t for this….

Photo: creativecommons.org/HomestarGirl7

My mom would try and throw away the empties, and the UC was always adamant about keeping his. His excuse was the return tax (5 cents because we lived in Oregon at the time); she always thought that was a little weird. After they got info on her hookup and his above him, they arrested the whole lot of them. Reddit User: 23eulogy23

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Working for the UC Sucks

A dad of my friend was a UC, and he told me the worst moment of his life was walking around a mall with his kid and being noticed by one of his “friends.” He talked his way out of the situation but ended up quitting the force altogether and moving; he said that was the worst thing about being a UC, despite having one of the crappiest jobs….

Photo: creativecommons.org/Must Be Art

You’re forever getting arrested and pepper-sprayed, and you get no recognition. Nobody on the force knows who you are for the most part because you have to keep your identity unknown, like he had to wear a mask when he trained, and having to keep up an identity takes a lot out of you. Nothing I would want to do. Reddit User: ireallywonderhowlong

A Rocket Launcher

Here’s a crazy undercover cop or spy story. It’s not my story but one of my professors used to be an undercover agent with Homeland Security; he would do a lot of buy and bust type operations: drugs, weapons…you name it, he’s probably bought it. One time, he told this story in class, and it was crazy….

Photo: creativecommons.org/_gee_

Anyway, he says one of the craziest things he has ever bought from an organization was somewhere in South America. It was a missile; not like an RPG or rocket launcher-type missile, but a full-on freaking military missile that could take out a small village if it was in the wrong hands. He had a ton of other stories, but that one always stuck out. Reddit User: DamagedSquare

He “Got His Old Job Back”

I have a family member who works for the government, and I’m pretty positive they did undercover work. Anyways, probably about 14 or 15 years ago, one day they come home driving a flatbed tow truck, and their work vehicle was gone. They gave him all the equipment and uniform. I was so young, so I asked why they had a tow truck….

Photo: creativecommons.org/dave_7

Their response was that they decided to quit their job and decided to work for a towing company instead. They drove the tow truck home for a couple of days, and eventually, the work car came back. I asked what happened to the tow truck, and they replied that they didn’t like the towing job and got their old job back. Reddit User: notcamerson

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They Looked Nothing Alike

I wasn’t the undercover cop, but when I was 17, I would go with an officer that wasn’t wearing a uniform, and we would go to every restaurant in town. It was set up by my parents because my dad also worked as an officer, and I thought it would be cool to get paid a little something in high school…. 

Photo: creativecommons.org/>>> Silly Rabbit, Trix are for Kids <<<

We would sit down, and I would ask for an alcoholic beverage and would wait to see if the staff would serve me. I always wondered how we didn’t have the cops called on us because I (17 years old, white, tall and chunky) and the officer (~40 years old, Hispanic, short and chunky) looked nothing alike at all. Reddit User: josh841854

It Took Him 6 Months

My coworker, who’s the highest level of UC in Canada, pretty much did what many consider as the biggest thing you can do undercover. He went to jail undercover to get an inmate to confess to a murder. The crazy thing is that when you’re undercover in jail, everyone, including the people that work at the jail, all think you’re just another prisoner….

Photo: creativecommons.org/FORES

It took him about six months to crack the guy he was after. Not even the guards knew he was a cop. This was about 15 years ago, and he still claims he hasn’t heard his real name since then. And also his mail and car are registered at the station. In the end, it was still pretty neat stuff. Reddit User: michael0990

Paid to Smoke

This story is nothing crazy, not like some, but my friend had an uncle who was DEA, and most of his stories were pretty docile, but I remember one story that he told that was more exciting than the rest. It makes you rethink all of the things people do undercover. His job was to find and investigate marijuana grow ops….

Photo: creativecommons.org/M. Martin Vicente

They only cared to bust them if it was gang-related or they were committing other serious felonies, so your mom and pop ops and college students were actually the safest forms. Because of this, he was able to stay undercover for quite a few years and was mostly paid to hang out with people and smoke. This would be a pretty sweet job if you ask me. Reddit User: IKnowVirtuallyNothin

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He Drank Canola Oil

I had a professor who was a colonel, served overseas, and worked in embassies, specifically in Eastern Eurasian countries/Russia (importantly, countries with a large affinity for vodka). He told my class about how he had to collect intel at some sort of dinner party function in one of these countries and was expected to keep up shot for shot with the partygoers so as to avoid suspicion….

Photo: creativecommons.org/Oregon State University

In order to keep up with the Slavs yet remain sober enough to do his job, he would down about a quarter cup of canola oil before attending the function to coat his stomach so he wouldn’t absorb the alcohol as quickly. He said it worked wonderfully, but all the alcohol would hit him like a brick house as soon as he got home from the party. Reddit User: beefygeese

Dealers

My boss in the agency we used to work in at the time was a heavy consumer. Yeah, it gets worse. He met a dealer, befriended him, and started hanging out, as their hobbies were similar. He introduced the dealer to his family, as he was a very friendly and smart-looking kind of guy, and the dealer even attended his dad’s funeral….

Photo: creativecommons.org/osseous

After a year or so, the dealer confessed he was an undercover agent and told him to stay away from my boss’s regular supplier, who turned out to be a big shot among criminal ranks. He couldn’t get himself to charge my boss since they were so close. I’ve never seen him again, and my boss quit smoking right there on the spot. He’s competing for strongman tournaments now. Reddit User: d0bermann

My Girlfriend’s Granddad

Not me but my girlfriend’s granddad. He once had to convince a drug cartel boss or whatever that he wasn’t an undercover cop, and the drug boss put a gun in his mouth basically trying to call him out, and my girlfriend’s granddad said to him, “If you think I’m a cop, shoot me now.” He was pretty confident because those guys aren’t like in the movies….

Photo: creativecommons.org/JoshBerglund19

They really will kill you, like dead as a doornail. Luckily, he didn’t shoot him, but her granddad left the place with pee all down his leg, which is very reasonable. And yeah, the guy got caught. Apparently, her granddad worked doing that kind of undercover stuff for a long time, but that’s the only story I ever heard. Reddit User: GalsDemSugar

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Ice Storm Ruins Cover

A buddy of mine had to get a photo of a guy who was suspected of child abuse and assault in another state. The guy never left his house, so getting a positive ID was a must. An ice storm was coming. My buddy was thinking, “Shoot. Everybody comes out to check the damage during an ice storm. He’s bound to come out.” So my buddy stakes out the guy….

Photo: creativecommons.org/Savannah River Site

Zoom lens aimed at the house. The storm comes in just like we thought, and the freaking storm knocks down the tree right next to his car; it falls and thankfully pins him in without crushing him. Someone calls the cops. There he is, “undercover” with police cars, fire trucks, and ambulances all around him trying to save him. Reddit User: BossHogg

The City Was South Park

When I was a police detective, we were running an investigation for illegal prostitution. It was a pretty sad operation honestly because the prostitutes we would bust were mostly drugged up, underage, or single mothers trying to break away from pimps. I went undercover for nights. Can I just say, they were some of the longest nights of my life?

Photo: creativecommons.org/jensissy2

Patrolling and acting like someone who knows the business. It wasn’t too hard, because everyone in that business is super desperate, but the men in it are disgusting. After catching enough perverts who engaged in buying these services, it was very rewarding. It took all days from Monday to Sunday, but it made my whole week. The city was South Park. Reddit User: [redacted]

Or a Bucket of Dat Chicken

Not me, but the husband of my wife’s best friend worked UC for a long time. My favorite story is the time he pulled up on a strung-out hooker pretending to be a john. Apparently, he would have to do this quite often and caught a lot of prostitutes and pimps. He said nothing too crazy ever happened except for this one time….

Photo: creativecommons.org/ishane

He rolls the window down and asks how much for some you know what. Hooker sizes him up for a second, then gestures over her shoulder to the chicken joint a block away and says, “Five dollars, or a bucket o dat chicken.” He completely lost it and had to drive away before he burst into hysterical laughter. Reddit User: MiVitaCocina

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How’s Your Uncle

So I’m not a cop, but my dad is. That’s how I got to be a part of compliance checks at convenience stores. At one store, the lady was taking an abnormally long time to check the date on my ID (my real ID, since the goal was to get them to say no to selling me cigs), and this guy decided to talk to me….

Photo: creativecommons.org/abcrumley

I ended up creating almost an entire life complete with family members, a girlfriend, a job, a hometown, and the reason I was buying smokes. When I got back to the car, I could see the COs laughing. They asked me how my uncle in Colorado was doing. I talk when I’m nervous, I guess, so it was a big joke. Reddit User: -C-Henn-

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