Redditors Share The Most Intimate Secrets That They’re Hiding From Their Partners

Some secrets are worse than they sound. Others might be better left untold. For example, would you really want your partner to tell you that you aren’t very good at something that means a lot to you? There are secrets that would rank as harmless, perhaps annoying at worst. Like if you have a husband who gives away the ending to your favorite TV show, week after week.

But what do you do when it goes beyond harmless?Not all secrets are bad. Having a rendezvous with a coworker and hiding the smitten text messages on your phone? Not good. Stealing your partner’s shirt so you can figure out what size they wear, all in order to buy them the perfect new look they’ve been wanting but refuse to spend the money on? Now that’s a secret we can get behind.

From the crafty to the sweet, people often keep secrets from their loved ones. You’re about to hear some of the most interesting, hilarious, and in some cases bizarre secrets that people have chosen to hide from their significant others. Buckle up…

Victor(ia)’s Secret

My girlfriend doesn’t know that I like to wear some of her things that she leaves at my house. I’m not exactly sure where I picked up this strange habit, but it feels so natural to me. I wear them around for a few days – to work, to get groceries, to the gym, at the bar….

I do all this and she knows nothing. And that’s because I wash them before she comes over again, so she has no clue. Reddit user: xUberAnts

With the Same Person

My significant other has no idea that I know she’s been cheating on me. The reason I know she’s been cheating is because I’m actually cheating on her with the same person. My girlfriend started the infidelity first actually.

The person she was cheating with just eventually ended up with me too. It turns out, our mutual third wheel isn’t very good at keeping secrets. But we still haven’t discussed the fact that I know to this day. Reddit user: chesterxcheato

The Shower Scandal

We had just had a birthday party celebrating my boyfriend and my one-year anniversary. While transferring a video I took with my boyfriend’s phone to my computer (the party was in full swing and I couldn’t find my own phone), I found a video that he took of my best friend in the shower.

It’s also my male best friend. It’s been around five years since I’ve found the video, and I’ve been too paranoid to bring it up since I don’t know what it means. Reddit user: daylightatnight

All About the Money

I found out that my girlfriend is only really with me because she’s aware of how much money my parents have. I found a group conversation with her mother and sister where she stated that if she stays with me, she’ll never have to work and that she can leave once my parents die.

She has no idea that I know, and I plan on leaving her once I finish school. I can’t wait to see the look on her face when she realizes I destroyed her plan. Reddit user: PMmeYourB

Deleting One’s History

I had an ex that I had to keep my dating history from. He was a very insecure person, and I had been with more people than he had. So in order for it to not be an issue (although it was), I  just let him believe that he and I were on the same level experience-wise….

He would often say, “I don’t think I’d be able to handle a person who had had more partners than me.” Looking back, it was so ridiculous; I’m happy we’re not together anymore. Reddit user: Langoustina

On Camera

One month, things got so bad for us financially that we couldn’t pay the bills. My significant other was working 13-hour days seven days a week for no money, I was getting no shifts at work, and my parents couldn’t help us. So, I cammed (online) for a bit of money.

I earned over $100 in less than an hour and it paid for our food that month. I only half-stripped and chatted a lot about innocent stuff, but I feel horrendous about it. I know he’d feel totally betrayed, and I hate the fact that other men saw what only he should get to see. Reddit user: library girl

The Secret Cupid

I did this for my brother, and neither of them know to this day: he broke up with his girlfriend after a really bad fight and had split for years. I’d never seen either of them as happy as they were when they were together, so one day, I texted her from his phone….

I was able to reconcile all of their problems, and they got married three months later. I don’t think I’ll ever tell them. You know, just to make sure they stay together and not dredge up the past. Reddit user: digitelle

Despicable Parents

My girlfriend doesn’t know that the reason why she hasn’t met my parents after nine months of dating is because they are completely against the idea of me dating someone with a baby. I know it’s a stupid, old-fashioned belief, and I absolutely love her child….

I also don’t want to expose her or her son to how badly my father treats my mother. I don’t want her to think that I would ever do anything like that to her. Reddit user: dezimondo

A Smelly Undertaking

I was the designated driver one night when I was out with my girlfriend and a bunch of her friends. They got absolutely demolished (a few too many drinks) and were adamant about getting burgers on the way home. My girlfriend managed to power through eight burgers and passed out immediately once we got home.

I was watching TV next to her when I noticed she had completely went to the bathroom in the bed, and it was number 2. I left, and she thinks, to this day, that it happened after I had gone. She is the type of girl who would be so ashamed if I told her, so I’ve kept it to myself. Reddit user: Jchriddy

Mother-in-Law Woes

My husband doesn’t know that I really can’t stand his mother. This makes me feel bad because his parents have done so much for us, but after we had our child, she pulled a 180 and has turned into the most overbearing, suffocating woman who thinks I can do nothing right in raising my son.

He knows I’m uncomfortable around her, but if he knew the depth of my loathing, there would be a blowout to end all blowouts. Reddit user: loonyloopylupin

Not Up To Par

My partner doesn’t know how I truly feel in the bedroom: when we’re in the throes of things, it isn’t fulfilling, like at all. He just doesn’t get my needs. And the horrible thing is that we’ve discussed it. He’s really started to put an effort in, but he can’t help that he can’t last longer than 5-10 minutes.

I make sure to never make him feel bad for that, though. But I can’t help but feel more than a little sad and frustrated afterwards. Reddit user: unsatisfiona

His Picture Problem

I knew my significant other had a tendency to watch things of a certain nature, but I had no idea just how bad it was, and he still doesn’t know that I’m aware of it. I realized he might have a problem when I found over two thousand photos and videos downloaded to a phone he had just gotten a month prior. Two thousand. One month. Let that sink in.

While I don’t care if he watches it on occasion, two thousand is more than a little excessive, and I have no idea what to do. Reddit user: ashcmor

When History Doesn’t Matter

My friend discovered that my girlfriend was previously in some films and worked as a dancer when she was young and desperate for money. She left both worlds behind by the time I had met her. To this day, she has no idea that I know and has no idea that I don’t care.

I don’t tell her because I don’t want her to think I look at her any differently because of it. Because I truly don’t. I love her more than anything. Reddit user: kuro99

Anime Love

A few months ago, I found out that my wife secretly gets off to anime and doesn’t think I know. I never bring it up to her, but it threw me for a loop since it was so unexpected. There have been multiple occasions where I’ve used her phone, which is where I saw the evidence.

I found multiple tabs of adult-themed anime when I opened her web browser. I think she’s embarrassed by it, but I hope that one day she opens up to me about it. Reddit user: Animates89

Zigging and Zagging

I love my wife completely and would give my life to save her, but I’m still pretty sure my girlfriend from many years ago was my soul mate. I broke it off with her to protect her from my own personal problems at the time and have always been haunted by it….

Every day since then has felt as though I’m living someone else’s life. It’s a good, happy life, but I feel like I zigged when the script called for me to zag and now the movie is one big ad-lib. Reddit user: johndoeswho

A Messy Job

Our relationship started out as long-distance, and she came up to visit me where I lived for four days. I had to work one of the days, and while she was at my house alone, she ended up clogging the toilet. She called her friend, freaking out because she couldn’t get it unclogged and proceeded to shovel some stuff out with a fork and plastic bag…

Then she dumped the evidence in the dumpster out back. Her friend found it hilarious and told me the night we moved in together. I haven’t told her I know about it because I don’t want to embarrass her. Reddit user: PinsNneedles

Plan B

My wife had been in a bunch of terrible relationships, and I found out that she had secretly been renting a storage unit with an entire apartment set up inside, just in case things didn’t work out between her and me. I found the receipts in her email inbox one day and still haven’t told her that I know to this day.

She eventually got rid of the storage unit, which is when I knew she was ready for me to propose. And that’s exactly what I did. Reddit user: spaceduct

Set Number 13

My girlfriend has two of those little parakeets from the pet shop. One of them is blue and gray, and the other is green and yellow. She loves them so much and has had them for like nine years. Well, one day, I come home early and they’re both dead: like, not moving at all, lights-out done. I was freaking out.

So, in my panic, I called her mom to ask how I should tell her. She told me that she’s replaced those birds probably 12 times and they die all the time. So I went to Petsmart and bought two identical birds, and she hasn’t noticed any difference and still loves her birds. Reddit user: Kalgor91

The Scar

My ex-girlfriend had a fairly large scar on her back and was always incredibly self-conscious about it. She always said she got it from falling off a horse when she was young. However, I found out from a friend that the scar was from an ex-boyfriend that pushed her onto his motorbike and the exhaust pipe burned her.

I’m really sad that this happened to her, and I wish I was there to protect her. I never told her that I knew, though. Reddit user: RJLestrange

Her Secret Activities

My girlfriend is incredibly generous, and even though she doesn’t get paid too much at her work, she loves to treat me to gifts and other nice things. I was curious to know how she could afford some things and discovered that she was secretly working as a cam girl for extra money.

She doesn’t know that I know, and I really don’t mind that she does it. I’d just rather she tell me than for me to confront her about it. Reddit user: CamBoy92705

The Weighting Game

My girlfriend doesn’t know that her weight bothers me. Let me just say that when we first got together, she did not look that way, but she started eating extremely bad food, which resulted in her gaining over 75 pounds. I tried to curb those bad habits as the months passed, but to no avail.

I encouraged her to get healthy, which  started out as really “get looking great again” but then genuinely turned into “I want her healthy so we can live to an old age together.” It’s really breaking my heart. Reddit: billbapapa

Missing the Steps

My husband missed his youngest brother’s first steps, our oldest son’s first steps, then our daughter’s, then our next son’s, and the steps of both of the next two kids; he was just in the wrong room or happened to not be in the house. He was so upset and disappointed each time that he didn’t get to see it.

When our next son stood up and took a few shaky steps one day, just as he’d (my husband) left to grab something from the store, I swore the older kids who happened to be there (and saw the first steps) to secrecy. And we said nothing when he came back through the door.

He walked into the living room just as our son pushed his way to his feet and happily squealed out “dada!” and stumbled up to him. He was so freaking happy he’d finally been there to see one of his kids’ first steps that he was tearing up. I refuse to ever tell him. Reddit user: fuzzyoctopus97

The Folder

I found a folder on my husband’s laptop that was suspiciously labeled to look innocuous. I found a collection of Facebook photos of women we knew, and I knew exactly what he was using them for. You know, his private down time when he was free to do whatever he wanted with himself.

However, he’s never been unfaithful, and it really doesn’t bother me that much. He has no idea that I know though. Reddit user: cr0ssey3d

The First, At 42

I’m his first girlfriend and he’s 42. I wasn’t sure whether that meant he was also a virgin before we got together, but none of that really mattered because he’s so attentive, and I care for him so much. He has no idea that I know that he hasn’t been in a relationship prior to me.

I wish he knew that it doesn’t change how much I adore him. However, even though his friends have informed me, I don’t bring it up because I know he’s very insecure about it. Reddit user: joesgal619

It’s A Blur

My wife asked me if she went to the bathroom when delivering our second child. The birth had happened so quickly that she doesn’t really remember how in control of her body she was. In fact, everything from the time we packed her bags and entered the emergency room onward was a real blur for her.

So I told her no because she was pretty self-conscious about it. She pooped though, but I won’t tell her. Reddit user: john2364

Sister Love

My partner doesn’t know that I think her sister is a better person and a better friend than she is. Her sister is just amazing in so many ways. She is downright beautiful inside and out. But I’m not attracted to her and I’m not even going to explore that idea.

I sincerely believe that my significant other is the woman I’m going to spend the rest of my life with, and happily so. Who knows what will happen in another life, though? Reddit user: ccheuer1

A Bad Habit

My wife smokes when I’m not home. It’s a habit she had for years but tried to kick for me (I hate smoking). I know she does because I always move the router to the window where the signal is best. Whenever I come home, the router is in a different position, away from the window.

I always put it back without her knowing, and I do call her out for smoking, but she still has no idea how I know. It’s pretty entertaining when she stutters after I confront her. Reddit user: fexian

The Christmas Non-Surprise

We don’t exchange a lot of gifts at Christmas, but we do try and pick one thing out that the other person would love to have but didn’t ask for. This past year, while my wife was out walking our dogs, the UPS guy knocked on the door and dropped off a large package.

It was labeled “Pizzeria Pronto” and was the gift she’d ordered for me! I took it inside and then thought to myself, “Nah, let me put it back on the front porch.” She came in from the walk and hid the box in her Jeep. When Christmas rolled around, she was very pleased that she was able to “surprise me” with something I really wanted. Reddit user: johnald515

Passing Bad Notes

It was a well-known fact that my high school girlfriend was very smart and would basically ace every class she was in. And she didn’t even have to study hard to do it. I eventually discovered that she was also purposely giving me and some of our other classmates bad notes to study from.

She did it so that her average would always be higher than mine and the rest of the class. She thought I had no idea, but I knew exactly what she was doing. Reddit user: HammerHeadKitty

The College Charade

My boyfriend thinks that I have no idea that he messed up his fall semester university entrance paperwork and didn’t submit it in time. I know that he isn’t currently enrolled at a university because the deadline passed, but he continues to live out the lie and keeps going to non-existent lectures.

I know he’s trying to figure it out on his own, so I haven’t told him that I know. But it cracks me up every time he says he’s going off to his classes. Reddit user: TrudyorTruth

Frozen Croutons

Everyone has a snack they love, and my wife loves eating croutons. Frozen croutons. She hides it like a mouse hides its cheese, but I have caught her munching on frozen croutons. This wasn’t some habit she picked up during our relationship or some strange craving she adopted due to her pregnancy; she’s just always loved eating them.

It’s the most bizarre thing, and she’s embarrassed by it, but every time I move the croutons to the pantry, they end up back in the freezer. Reddit user: jamtamzy

 At The Stroke Of Midnight

The first time my significant other and I spent the night together, I woke up during the night to use the bathroom. I came back in the room and she let one rip that was one of the loudest I’ve ever heard. I started laughing like crazy and she almost woke up. Almost….

We’ve been together for seven years now and I haven’t told her. She’ll just be way too embarrassed, even after all this time, if I let her know. Reddit user: [redacted]

Hiding Money

My significant other doesn’t know how much cash I have on me. My husband works and I’m a stay-at-home mom, so it is rare that I even have any cash, but when I do, I hide it. He gets upset when I spend more than $150ish at the grocery store, but that doesn’t really cover a family of four….

So when I have to get extra food or the kids need something for school, it comes out of my secret stash. To be fair, he would be mad if he found out, but he would also take it and gamble it away on lottery tickets, whether it was $5 or $30. Reddit user: Glitter_is_my_game

Sneaking Food

I’ve been with my significant other for almost a year now, and there are some things he doesn’t know that I do behind his back. I sneak eat Taco Bell and other fast foods like burgers, fries, and sodas at least once or twice a week because he’s such a health freak.

I also eat almost exclusively junk food when he is out of town on his business and health seminars. And I love it. Reddit user: grandmaperm

The Case of the Missing Dress

We came back on different flights from vacation once (her connection was back through a city she had a work trip in before meeting up). I took back some of her clothes in my suitcase, arrived before her, and decided to wash her clothes, but I majorly shrunk a very nice wool dress.

I threw it away, and to this day, she thinks one of her family members took it. I won’t ever admit that it was me, because she’d have to apologize to her family. Reddit user: FinalF137

Made-Up Friends

My ex made up a person and spoke to me as them. We met when we were quite young, and we were both pretty strange. I put it down to insecurity and wanting to look like she had cool friends (I was a little older). I never let on that I knew.

It would have been super embarrassing for her, and this was literally at the start of the relationship. She made up quite a few stories about this guy, and I got a few emails from “him.” She didn’t realize that changing the name of the account didn’t actually change the address, which was fully visible. Reddit user: Morgoth_the_DM

Caribbean Critters

I went to the Dominican Republic for a vacation with my girlfriend. Everything was fine until we went to bed. I noticed a lizard walking around under the bed and some pretty big centipedes on other nights. If I told my girlfriend, she would have lost her freaking mind, and our vacation would have been ruined.

Instead, she had a great time and I slept like crap for a week, worried I’d be bitten by critters. If I told her, we’d never get to vacation in the Caribbean again. Reddit user: Hocktober

Not Romantic Enough

I’ve been in a relationship with this man for just about three years, and it really bothers me how unromantic he is. He’s a good, faithful man, and I really shouldn’t be complaining, because he does a lot for me.  Plus I love him very much, but he’s just not very thoughtful….

It makes me feel pretty bad for wanting a lot more. Especially when I know how crazy some of my own friends’ relationships are. Reddit user: sparkleplentylikegma

The Signature of a Ghost

For Christmas, my then-girlfriend, now wife got me a book by my favorite author that has a print of the author’s signature on the title page. I know it is print because it was posthumously published and printed — meaning that the author had already died by the time the book was published. But she doesn’t know that.

When she showed me, she was so excited that I didn’t have the heart to tell her it was just the normal edition. So I just acted like I was really excited. Reddit user: OklahomEnt

Female Friends

I am male, and I keep her (my girlfriend) in the dark about female friendships at the office. I told her about conversations initially, and the subject matter would upset her. Nothing inappropriate was said; it was usually things about clothes, diet, and exercise….

She feels that those are intimate things that casual acquaintances should not discuss. It is very strange. She has some odd insecurities. Reddit user: Metboy70

The Recaps

My husband loves binge-watching shows like Grey’s Anatomy, Chicago Fire, etc. but loves talking about the last episode in great detail more. I secretly hate listening to these long-winded stories, but I try really hard to listen intently. At times, I dig my nails into my hand because I’m listening to Meredith’s backstory again….

He’s so animated when he goes off on another tangent, and that cuteness makes the story bearable. I listen because I watched my grandmother mourn the death of my grandfather a few years ago. She would say that she wished he would just pester her one last time. So there’s no way I’m telling him that I don’t care what happens between Olivia and Quinn.

I know that one day I might not get to hear any more Shonda Rimes recaps. There’s no way I’ll tell him. Reddit user: Chick1929

The Tale of Three Mojitos

My wife thinks that our betta fish, Mojito, has been alive for like five years. It’s pretty crazy seeing as how fish don’t live very long, but that’s exactly what she believes. What she doesn’t know is that the role of Mojito has been played by THREE separate betta fish over that time.

Her mom was the one who told me that she’s been replacing them, and the tradition was passed onto me. R.I.P. Mojitos one and two. Reddit user: WingmanZero

The Same New Necklace

The first piece of jewelry I bought my wife was a necklace. We went on holiday and she lost it. I said I would replace it, but it wasn’t the same; she was upset that she’d lost it for sentimental reasons. I emailed the hotel and of course, they hadn’t found it.

So, I bought a replacement and told my wife they found it. She was so happy about it that spending the money on a second necklace was more than worth it. Reddit user: YuccaYucca

Drop It Low

If my mom wants to hide literally anything from my dad, no matter what it is, she just puts it somewhere where he would have to bend over to see it. It doesn’t matter if it’s something like a package of Oreos — if my dad has to bend over, he’s never going to find it.

I’ve tested it with my own snacks when I was still living with them to confirm that it works. He’d be mad if he knew how many snacks we’ve hidden from him simply because he doesn’t bend over low enough to see it in the cabinet. Reddit user: gothiclg

Reading Romance

My ex significant other used to read me chapters from whatever book he was reading at the time. It was usually me that initiated it, mostly because it felt so warm and intimate, but also because I knew he had dyslexia and dysgraphia as a child. So it would give him a little boost of confidence.

But this also meant he was actually really terrible at reading stories. I’m talking pure monotone; it made any book extremely boring, and I would cuddle up next to him so I could see it and read it in my head as he read. But I liked to think the good outweighed the bad, and I never told him! Reddit user: dennisthehygienist

Not Exactly a Savior

My wife is deathly afraid of roaches. She gets crazy goosebumps and pretty much is reduced to tears if she sees them. She’s from Texas and had to deal with scorpions when she was younger, so this is crazy to me. It’s my job to dispatch the intruders via death by Swiffer mop….

She usually goes to the other room, and I’ve had a few occasions where I missed the roach. I would grab some toilet paper and ball it up like it was inside and tell her that it was dead. I don’t have it in me to tell her that we have a D.B. Cooper roach hiding inside our house somewhere. Reddit user: Box_of_Rockz

The Lost Remote

When my mom and dad started dating in college, my mom accidentally took the remote control for the TV from dad’s apartment. She had no idea how the remote ended up in her bag and then in her apartment, but then she put two and two together. Then she kept it anyway….

He and his roommates looked for it and fought about it for months before she finally worked up the courage to leave it on the arm of their sofa. Reddit user: notinmyjohndra

The Secret Saver

My girlfriend moved in with me a few months ago and wanted to split the monthly bills. I was already covering all of it, so I was okay just continuing that way, but she was insistent. She doesn’t make too much, so instead of telling her the real amount, I told her a lower one.

But it’s still a believable amount to pay. It isn’t much, but I feel a little better knowing that she’s saving up a bit more every month than she would’ve otherwise. Reddit user: RudeMonster

80% Mayonnaise

My husband’s favorite dip has approximately eighty percent mayonnaise. The reason this is important is because he has a terrible aversion to mayonnaise…or so he thinks. And it’s been that way from the time he was a child; he just hates the condiment and no one really knows why, including him.

His mom has made it for his whole life when he’s not been around, and now I continue the charade. It’s so good but so bad at the same time. Reddit user: meguin

The Brown Stain

I took a girlfriend with me on a vacation to Hawaii for our 18-month anniversary. The first thing we did when we hit the AirBnB was shower off; it was a long flight. I was washing her down, and as I got to a certain part, I notice she left a huge brown stain on the washrag…

I was disgusted, but I loved her. So, I cleaned her up and hid the rag so she didn’t find out. Later that night, I woke up and did a secret load of laundry so she never found out. Reddit user: Copious-GTea

The Money Dropper

I feel really bad about how much money my guy spends on me (food, gifts, gas money), and he refuses to let me pay him back. He doesn’t make that much, but he is so devoted to me. So sometimes I slip $5 and $10 bills into his wallet, pockets, and dresser drawers for him to “find.”

If he gives me his card to go into stores to buy something, I use mine instead and don’t tell him. He’d be really, really sad if he found out because he loves taking care of me. Reddit user: Astyyria

Cringing On the Inside

My significant other misuses words…a LOT. I’m a language guy, so usually, I’m pretty on top of what I say and more so the errors that others make. But I get the feeling that that is a really soft spot for her. Her previous partners made tons of fun when she spoke, so she’s pretty sensitive now.

So, I just internally cringe and say nothing about it. I usually know what she’s trying to say. And I love her enough to look past these minor errors. Reddit user: gogozrx

A Problem with a Leak

My ex-girlfriend had a few too many drinks at a party and passed out on the couch. When I went to check on her, I noticed she had peed all over the couch. It had soaked through her clothes and had gotten into the couch. It was pretty shocking, and I knew I had to do something about it.

To avoid embarrassment, I filled up a bucket with water and threw it over her to disguise it as a prank (I’m that kind of boyfriend); she still has no idea. Reddit user: lucioalvii

Brown Bananas

My wife doesn’t even know this, and the only reason I’m being this deceptive is because I love her cooking. Occasionally, I hide bananas, then make them reappear when they are brown, just so my wife will make banana bread. When they magically pop up, I would then tell her this…

“Look! You bought these bananas and no one ate them, and now they’re brown. I’m not about to waste these, so why don’t you make some banana bread or something?” Reddit user: Richard-Hindquarters

The Spider Love/Hate Relationship

Spiders are my secret. My wife hates them with a passion; it’s a fear she’s had from the time she was a little girl and is now part of her adult life. So if I happen to find one crawling around when she isn’t around, I’ll take it outside and never tell her….

If one is nearby and she knows, I have to squish them as if they killed my dog. Then I have to show her that I’ve put its body outside, too. Reddit user: PotentiallyTrue

A World-Class Son

This is actually a secret that I’m keeping from my mom. She wrote me a note once for missing a homework assignment. Unfortunately, her handwriting and spelling were so bad that the teacher grilled me for trying to weasel my way out by forging it. My mom didn’t finish middle school and is not highly educated.

I was so embarrassed that I decided to just take the detention and public ridicule from the teacher as a liar rather than ask my mom to back me up. I now have a masters degree to make her proud. Screw you Mr. Richardson. Reddit user: DannyEbeats